Grooves and Blues

Sometimes all it takes to fuel the fire is a sign. Perhaps a literal one. Though I loathe the fact it’s been four-plus months since my last post, it’s good to take a little bit of a hiatus. Posts prior to the previous May update are also sparse.

The same goes for getting back to the gym. It’s the worst. (The gym, that is.)

A couple months ago, some virus hit me hard. It crept up and then lingered for much longer than anticipated. Perhaps this was some type of flu or food poisoning. The lightheadedness intensified. The pain in my gut got to the point where it felt as if hands were gripping and twisting my intestines. I had to meet Katey and one of her racing colleagues at designated halfway point Southwick Beach to handoff their lunch/refuel because the 120-mile ride was part of their Ironman Lake Placid Training.

While waiting, when I wasn’t trying to walk it off through the state park’s trails, I was pooping — if you would call it that — in the woods or curled up in the fetal position in the back seat. Good thing I keep a roll of toilet paper in my car.

Finally, after an almost two-month hiatus, I made it back to Planet Fitness, or P-Fit. It’s odd being back. Unlike some movie stars who can’t find a role and all of a sudden become health gurus, I find myself productively playing catch up. Despite being so far from a self-proclaimed health guru and just trying to get/be/stay healthy, it works. It was an unusually slow process, perhaps gym anxiety has come back.

P-Fit is my gym choice for a few reasons. First, it’s geographically accessible. I can get my cardio in going to the gym and running home. Since I’m not the most motivated when it comes to this (obviously), so having a gym in close proximity is a huge perk. Plus, by investing in their Black Card, I can utilize any P-Fit location.

The membership is very affordable. I can’t see myself spending a crazy amount for a gym or health center that caters to a particular niche and comes across as a frarority. Sure, it’s wonderful that classes are included at those more expensive gyms. Still, I’m having to spend drastically more, I’d rather let my gym anxiety take the wheel and drive my person to a supplier, where I can invest in my own gym equipment.

Sure, you can argue and boast how your gym encourages an encouraging environment and you encourage me to be encouraged. I’ll only encourage you to continue your reel while I smile and nod.

However, I don’t really love P-Fit. Yes, I said it. It’s a hearty like.

One issue is that my location (Westvale/Syracuse) got rid of the office-esque wall clocks. There were three or four, but they decided to go with one big P-Fit clock. It’s not big enough when working out on the other side of the gym.

Not having clocks in multiple locations is a disadvantage for timing a workout. For those not wearing a watch…

…this encourages people to bring their cell phones, which they’re already (overly) attached to in waking life. Cell phones encourage interruptions and people to sit idly at a machine or on a bench for an unproductive length of time. A phone is one more thing that has to be carried around along with my keys. Why did P-Fit get rid of the wall key holders they once had? It was a poor move.

So, I bought a watch. Problem solved. The key situation has to be resolved.

P-Fit’s motto is the “judgment-free zone.” Mind the huge sign hanging on the wall. There’s a light (that always seems out), a.k.a. the “Lunk Alarm,” and a statement to make an example about the non-existent/hypothetical Ricky.

Ricky is slamming his weights, wearing a body building tank top, and drinking from a gallon water jug — what a lunk!

P-Fit is a hypocrite. Hypothetical Ricky is being made an example of and the wording describing him is very judgy. Incredibly judgy. (It’s in the definition, ya lunks.)

Yes, P-Fit caters to the casual and more novice gym crowd. That’s totally fine. And, yes, slamming weights is a bit intimidating. OK, it’s a smidge annoying and more so than the repetitive soundtrack through the speakers.

The tank top comment and gallon water jug are reaching. Guys, including yours truly, wear tank tops. Katey, who gets in free as a guest with my Black Card membership, agreed with and reiterated my thoughts: “At least he’s staying hydrated.”

There is one fellow in particular who brings a thing of juice and sets it down in the middle of the floor or next to a machine he doesn't use. That gallon of water is not worse.

There is one (average, Joe Blow) fellow in particular who brings a thing of juice and leaves it in the middle of the floor or next to a machine he doesn’t use. That gallon of water is not worse. I’m not going to lose sleep over it, but c’mon.

Speaking of which, it’s getting late. It’s 11:51 p.m. I have to get my P-Fit on in the morning. One thing is for certain:

It’s great to be in the groove again.

health writing

Christopher S. Malone View All →

I play with words and invisible objects.

A mind, a pen and a piece paper have the best relationship ever.

---

"Remember this--if you shut your mouth, you have your choice."

- F. Scott Fitzgerald

3 Comments Leave a comment

  1. I’m crazy and belong to 2 gyms– P-Fit and Fitworks. P-Fit is primarily about convenience since after working out at Fitworks with a trainer, I’ve kind of outgrown their model in a sense. But there aren’t any other convenient gyms that offer what I’m looking for in my immediate area. Fitworks is great for classes and personal training and they have more intermediate accommodations, but the 2 closest locations are 20 minutes away in opposite directions. So until I find something more convenient, I will continue to frequent P-Fit. Hang in there, and glad you’re back into the routine!

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